EPISODE 5!

Partially closed captioned in Spanish!

Beating a Dead Dog

PMF is a democratic band in a lot of respects, but when it comes to the songwriting craft, it becomes more difficult to maintain that. All three of us write words and music, so we typically take turns introducing home-recorded songs to the rest of the band. Sometimes parts for other instruments are already written and sometimes there are just rough guidelines. Other times it's as open as "play what you want and we'll see what happens." There's really no formula for us, so occasionally we will run into a section of a song where we have three completely different perspectives. So who gets the final say?

Last night, Kirk heard something he wanted tweaked in "Dog Milk" that Ryan and I never really had issues with in the past. We had been playing a part of the song the same way for probably close to a year, but we weren't playing it exactly the same way. For one of us to add or subtract a single beat felt unnatural. For Kirk, it was important that Ryan and I were tight and synchronized. Sure, we outnumbered him, but we still owed the songwriter his vision (or at least his vision of PMF's vision), so we descended into an obsessive half-hour of counting madness over a two-second part of the song that never shows up again. The final tally was 3 beats followed by 5 beats and a lot of bruises.

Was it worth it? Sources say yes, but only Captain Kirk knows for sure. The funny thing is that he didn't even write the part in the first place! When the band played the song for the first time, I wasn't present, but I received recordings of the practice the next day. One of the takes featured either Wally or Ryan (I'll have to do some digging) playing a sped-up part at the end of one of the measures in the intro. It may have been an accident for all I know, but it was unique and worth learning for the next practice. We finally played it together, but I was the only one doing the part. The rest of the guys threw rocks at me until I was unconscious. When I woke up, Kirk decided the part could stay, under one condition: we must fight about it in a year's time and post it on YouTube. We shook on it.

Now please allow this close-up of my giant beard-garden to continue the story (I assure you there are finally other faces in this episode):

Victim of the Tiger

Same car, different striped polo.

Here is some more bumbling on about a Ryan Stevens-penned track that we will be recording for The New Album, and it's relationship to click tracks and "Eye of the Tiger":



Because it was raining, and there wasn't any low-speed traffic in the tunnel, I was more preoccupied with my driving this time, so if I was too distracted to make any intelligent points, here are my intended conclusions:

• "Eye of the Tiger" is an awesome song with a off-beat, quirky intro.
• "Victim, Himself, No Problem" is an awesome song that will have an on-beat, quirky intro and second verse.
• Time is like a clock in my heart.
  
• Pop into Pop-Up Video

Next episode: Someone else talking.

The Rabies of Oz

The recording adventure continues...

One thing we're trying to accomplish during pre-production is tightening up our songs by using a click track. It's the first time we've done the metronome thing as a band, so we spent some time last week experimenting with the logistics of it. We tried hooking up a clicking drum machine to Ryan's headphones, but it wasn't loud enough. Then we gave the headphones to Kirk and let Ryan play along with the bass that was playing along with the click in yet another set of headphones. This convoluted setup wasn't effective either. Then I recorded a guitar track with a click on the 8 track for Ryan to listen to while he played drums, but it ended up being too slow. We wouldn't be able to vary the speed without recording it several times, which was unrealistic.

Finally, Mike Moebius, Master of Moonlight Mile Studios said "Why don't you just play it through the PA, dummies?" So we did, and it worked pretty damn well. After playing each song two or three times, we got the hang of it and zeroed in on the exact tempos we wanted to the songs to be. The final breakthrough was changing the click sound itself to a much more exhilarating midrange snare beat. From then on it was fucking Dance Party PMF.

Here's a shortened, vocal-less version of "Rabies First Battle" that ended our Thursday night:

PMF - Albumbling

Ok, here is Episode 1 of the PMF new album adventure. More tomorrow.

Not Taking it EZ

PMF will be laying off the shows for a while in order to prep for album season. We may pop up onstage here and there in the next few months, but priority numero uno is completing a recording. There have been a million changes to this (dis)organization since its inception so we want to make sure we do this right.

And rather than keep this painful/fun experience completely to ourselves, we want to share it with youse. I know I've been making big promises all year about making PMF videos and photos and crap like that all year, and then never actually doing it. Hopefully, I won't be bullshitting us all again. The camera is fully charged and ready to capture candid moments of the recording process, both pivotal and pretarded.

Until I start actually doing that, you can check this out the PMF video bar, newly updated with old videos. I don't know how I forgot to post the video clips from that Zac made of our infamous July Groove on Grove show, but now they're there, so there. The clips up are "Dog Milk" and our WJ & the Sweet Sacrifice/Faith No More/Tim & Eric/etc. mashup, "It's It." There's also an accompanying write-up in the JC Independent where you are free to leave comments, hint-hint. Don't worry, we're not getting invited back next summer.

PMF w/OD do it for the TTs.

PMF will officially be kicking off the 1st Annual Toasting to the Ta-Ta's Bar Crawl 2pm this Saturday at the Iron Monkey in Jersey City. Please note the venue change--Iron Monkey is adjacent to the original site, Automata Chino. Wristbands are $15 ($10 if you wear pink) and have magical powers.

Joining us on the bill is Overflowing Dumper, a noise-rock project featuring former members of Kilbacca and Invisible Creepo. Yeah, really. Please join us in JC for this good cause. Good 'cause it's good.

Here is the entire day's schedule of events:

2-4 pm: Iron Monkey/Automato Chino
* 97 Greene St, Jersey City, NJ
* Live performances!

4-6 pm: O'Connells
* 111 Montgomery St, Jersey City, NJ

6-8 pm: Barrow Street Bar
* 292 Barrow St, Jersey City, NJ
* $2 burgers and $1 dogs in the courtyard...weather permitting

8-10 pm: Porto Lounge
* 286 First Street, Jersey City, NJ

10pm-????: Lucky 7s Tavern
* 322 2nd St, Jersey City NJ

Connoisseurs of Mammary Glands

I can't say this definitively yet, but it's looks like Plowing Mud Forever will probably be playing an afternoon show on Saturday, September 12th, quite possibly at Automata Chino in Jersey City, and if this happens it will most likely be part of a benefit to raise money for the American Breast Cancer Foundation. When we have official confirmation we will give the rest of the details.

I can say with 100% confidence that Plowing Mud Forever will be playing this Saturday night at Ace of Club, in NYC.

Ace of Clubs - 9 Great Jones St. NYC - doors at 7pm - 21+ - $10

8pm - Open Denile
9pm- Plowing Mud Forever
10pm - Scalera
11pm - Knife the Glitter
12am - Torrential Downpour

PMF EXCLUSIVE LYRICS

Here are some of the words to Plowing Mud Forever songs that you may or may not hear at the Ace of Clubs show next Saturday:

"Salesman" - ass, hell, crap
"Mesmerado" - you, me, OK, baby, yeah
"Victim, Himself, No Problem" - alacrity, aaaaaagghhhhhhhh
"Rabies First Battle" - babies' first rattle
"Teen Steam Dream Queen" - My Little Pony
"Sitcom" - fuck, die
"Dog Milk" - white, warm, hot, juice
"Bottleneck" - vernacular, Large Marge
"Especially Heinous" - Ice-T, Port-a-Potty
"Serpentor's Love" - snakes, flames, broads
"Modus Operandi" - Katharine Hepburn

If you are going to sing along with our songs, only sing those words over and over again as loud as possible while spinning around like a tornado and urinating on everyone in the vicinity. You'll thank us later.

Thing-Things

It's vacation time for most of this hemisphere, so Plowing Mud Forever has(s)holed themselves up in the studio with a colony of termites to continue working on new songs and brushing up on old new songs. Coming down the pike we've got:

"The Night Report" - The sequel to "Sitcom." In this song, Kirk is actually sent back in time to protect you, not kill you. It is also revealed that Ryan is your father and Rollie will finally defeat Apollo Creed. Does that Smeel Mainly? Musically, I can't even begin to describe what is happening in this song. What if Mastodon eats a Jesus Lizard that is snacking on a Blue Oyster? Cult hit? You betcha!

"The Cliff" - A haunting little ditty that could end up being the simplest, pussiest PMF song ever! It's only got 4 different parts! And no screaming! What if Jimmy Eats the World? Would he Hum? Yeah Yeah Yeah!

"Untitled" - Kirk's still going through titles and lyrics on this one, so I don't know what it's going to be about. I can tell you that the intro is long and calm, but then the rest of the song lunges out from the bushes and gnaws on your balls. I think there's a dog singing backup vocals, I'm not sure.

Elsewise, we've got another show with Torrential Downpour in a few weeks, but you already knew that because you've probably added the Plowing Mud Forever Live Calendar to your own Google Calendar. Right?